Finally, Finally, FINALLY, January 3rd arrived and at 1:00pm I would go in for my very first ultrasound. I was so excited. I couldn't sleep at night and when I did sleep, I had dreams of my first doctor's appointment. I had no idea if I would leave that appointment with joy or sadness and I so desperately wanted it to be joy.
I got to the doctor's office early as requested and sat in an empty waiting room (it was lunch time) and watched The Rescuers on TV until my name was called. Jason was not there yet and since they called me back a little early, I began to worry that he would miss it.
The nurse started my ultrasound and I immediately saw the baby. It was the most unbelievably amazing thing I had ever seen. I assumed it would just be a smear on the screen and the nurse would have to show me which smear was the baby, but in this ultrasound it was quite obvious. Our little one even wiggled as we watched and I grinned from ear to ear. Another nurse brought Jason back then and I was so relieved that he would get to see this amazing sight for himself. He patted my foot as we watched and the nurse took all the measurements she needed. We could see the little heart beat at 167 bpm and the nurse told us all was looking great and as it should be.
Are there even words in this language to describe how I felt? Grateful, overwhelmed, ecstatic, amazed, JOYFUL! We then went to an office to talk with my doctor and nurse practitioner. I just sat there grinning at Jason and staring at my ultrasound pictures until they came. We talked about upcoming appointments, blood work, and they answered all of my questions. They gave me a Fit Pregnancy magazine (which I read from cover to cover that night) and all sorts of other coupons and tips for a healthy pregnancy, telling me what I could and could not eat and do.
When we walked out into the hallway, Jason asked me to wait and he pulled a small bag out of his jacket pocket. He opened the box inside and gave me the most beautiful necklace with a mother and child on it. He put it around my neck right then, and I was sure I was the happiest, most blessed girl in the world.
We walked outside and there was my mom waiting. She couldn't help herself, she had to come and so I showed her the pictures and then we went to my sister's house for homemade chocolate chip cookies and to show her the pictures as well. I told Caroline and Caleb then, and Caroline had sort of guessed since she'd overheard so many of Julie's conversations with me about it. Caleb looked at my tummy and said he hoped it was a boy.
It was such an amazing day. A truly amazing, wonderful, blessed day. I continued to wait and pray until February when the first trimester would be over and I would be supposedly in a more safe place with my pregnancy. Until then, I gazed at my little one in my ultrasound pictures and smiled. And smiled and smiled.